The Life Of A Thirty-Six Year Old Undergrad
Hello Everyone,
I started this blog a couple of years ago in hopes that with my truths I would reach at least one person. If I could just reach one person and make their day, give them a laugh or make them feel less alone in their daily struggles it would all be worth it for me. Today, I will be fearless and unapologetically vulnerable with all who decide to read this post and watch my videos. So, buckle up kiddos.
I’m a 36 year old, full-time stay at home mom. I have several “side hustles” as you kids would say these days but the most important job I have is making sure my kid doesn’t turn into an asshole. With that being said, in addition to my every day life on July 1st, I enrolled into the 2nd Summer Session at UNC – Charlotte. For those of you who don’t know my story or struggles with school here’s a brief history. School is hard and has always been hard for me. I have always had to put in so much extra work and effort to get the average grades that I have accumulated throughout my scholastic career. I’ve been in and out of College since August of 2001, hence being a 36 year old undergrad.
I want to put my story out there because I want my daughter and every student out there to know that everyone has their own journey, and this just happens to be mine. Life happens and I had to make the decision to stop and start school several times since 2001. To some people (mainly myself) I’ve failed, because I didn’t do things in the traditional way. However, I’ve had a career in the forklift tire industry, I’ve been engaged, married, spawned a child, been a homeowner, a friend, a daughter, a sister, an artist… I’ve turned into the woman I am today through this beautiful and crazy journey of mine. This was my path and I’m grateful for every detour and wrong turn and I want people to be proud of their journey.
I’m attaching three videos that I recorded on an app called Marco Polo (this is NOT an ad). I’ve grown to love this app because I get to see my family and friends faces and keep in touch with them on my time. These three videos were made last week while chatting with two of my girlfriends, on my very first week back at school. This is me at my most vulnerable self. This is as raw as it gets. So, take a look and let it sink in. This is real life, this is how I look, this is how I speak, this is what I’m going through.
Although this degree is and has always been super important for me, that piece of paper does not define me. Just because I suck at school does not mean I suck at life. I really need all the kids and students struggling with school to hear that. SCHOOL DOES NOT DEFINE YOU.
Just because I struggle with school does not mean I’m not good at anything else and it certainly does not mean I can’t excel at anything else. I’m a mother, a wife, a gardner, a baker, an artist, an event planner, an avid bird watcher, a writer and proud nerd. Being those things, loving my people and raising my daughter; those are the things that define me. I’m not the best at all those things either, but those are the things and those are the people that I wake up for every morning. Being a mother to my daughter, a wife to my husband, watching my birds while sipping coffee, doing crafts with my kid, baking for friends and family, nerding out to the fullest extent with the hobbies I love and just trying to be the best version of myself that I can be.
So, be gentle with yourselves. Just because your siblings or friends make school look easy does not mean that they don’t have to work harder on other things. Everyone has their own struggles, trust me. Just keep going, keep working hard at the things you want and make time for the things you love doing. I promise, the struggle will be worth it.
His, Hers and yours,
The anxious and overwhelmed 36 year old undergrad,
Melvi
P.S. My trucker mouth is in full gear in these videos. So, maybe ear muff your kids if they are around. Also, please feel free to share them with someone who needs comfort in their struggle or just a laugh.
